Monday, April 13, 2009

Coming out of the Desert

If you read here regularly, you've probably noticed a couple things:
1 - my writing is often a direct reflection of where I'm at with my personal spiritual walk;
2 - my writing has been fairly infrequent and non-spiritual lately.
Since this blog is not about pretending to be who I'm not, where I'm not, or what I'm not I'm just going to come right out and name the obvious... I have found myself in a spiritual "dry spell" during the past month or so.

If you've never had a time like this, you will be utterly baffled by that statement. Here's my best shot at describing it for you. It is not that I have changed, so much as what I feel is different. Where I can often feel the presence of the Holy Spirit around me and with me - even in my day-to-day life, I have not felt Him lately. When I can usually recognize God's hand of providence actively working in my life with ease, these days I am needed to make a conscious effort to look for and acknowledge His work. Of late, my sense of the Lord has been more head knowing than heart knowing. Does that make any sense?!

This isn't new to me; I have been here before. The difference is that the last time I found myself feeling far from God I was desperate. I fell hard and fast, and desperately clawed my way out of that pit of the empty soul until I found Him again. This time, I arrived here simply though a slow process of drifting and shifting. It was so gradual that I didn't even realize I had moved.

A combination of factors likely jumbled up together to cause this gap. Busy in life, busy in ministry, lack of sleep, changes in routine, being away, etc. The contributing factors aren't really all that important, though. What is important is my relationship with my Lord and how to get it back to where it should be.

I've taken some steps that I know will help. I've returned (as of this morning) to my 5:30am scheduled appointment with God and His Word. I'm returning to our women's Bible study group, doing Esther: It's Tough Being a Woman by Beth Moore (and Bethie always gets me deep into His Truth). I'm creating another prayer calendar so that my prayer life becomes intentional again (it's really handy for those times when you just don't know what to pray about).

But the most important thing I am doing to quench my thirst in this dry spell is what Beth Moore tells us she did when she recently experienced this kind of distance from the Lord: renounce the lie. There is really only one way to remove yourself from the presence of the Lord, and that is to choose sin over relationship with Him. If that is not the case (which I don't believe it is with me right now), the distance that is felt is not real - it doesn't exists. He is not far from me, nor I from Him. The distance, the desert, it is a lie.

So in spite of the enemy's greatest efforts to make me feel apart from my Abba, I will live in the Truth. I am going to think, speak, and act as though I can feel His presence in my daily life. Because the Truth is that HE IS RIGHT HERE! Acting in His Truth, renouncing the lie, and believing God, regardless of what I "feel." And trusting that, in His perfect timing, I will "feel" Him again (soon).

*God is who He says He is.
God can do what He says He can do.
I am who God says I am.
I can do all things through Christ.
God's Word is alive and active in me.
I'm believing God!

If you've ever experienced one of these "dry spells," what action did you take to pull yourself out of it and return to God's side?

* Taken from Beth Moore's Believing God (and professed from my very heart).


  1. sounds like you're right on w/ the steps you're taking. in my experience it was just falling o/o the routine that took me there and going back to the basics brought me back:)

    thank you for this post. i always appreciate your honesty.

  2. Thank you for sharing that! So encouraging.

  3. Like all relationships, our relationship with God takes time and work. I am thankful that that unlike human relationships, God is always willing to forgive us and is waiting with open arms when we seek Him. I don't know how many times I have had to make the effort to consciously return to God with my whole heart instead of just following along half-heartedly.

    You are always in my prayers :)

    Love you!


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